>I feel so disgusted with myself, I had probably the biggest binge I have had in a long time this evening, it was awful, I just ate and ate and ate. Obviously purged after, but I am so cross that I can’t be stronger than that. I really do not want to be getting back into daily binging again.
I spent some time with my parents this afternoon, they don’t think it is good for me staying in all of the time, so have been keeping on for days, so eventually today I agreed to go to town with them. I didn’t feel as anxious as I thought I would, except for in one shop, but I think that was due to the lighting in that particular shop. For some reason my anxiety and panic attacks can be very triggered by some shops lighting, especially if it is flickering slightly. I have no idea why, but I now have some shops that I no longer even attempt to go in.
I feel so big and disgusting after that awful binging and purging session earlier, I hate this feeling.